Gatos Confessions

I thought that lately everything was getting so much better.

And it was, but to be honest everything came back.

Nothings good anymore.

I hate to say it, but I'm not alright anymore.

I don't want to have to fake smiles anymore.

Or be a door mat for people to stop on.

To put it in poetic terms I'd say I'm drowning,

I'm falling hard into myself.

It was bad enough I had to deal with 'it' but now

Now its fucking back.

I'm too afraid to ask for help.

My friends are so wonderful.

They don't need to deal with this.

But I think they'll read this anyways.

So at least I got my point across.

I don't want my friend Kibum to worry about me anymore. Hes already done so much and been stepped on so much. I feel like I need to be his umbrella.

But whats an umbrella with a leak?

I want help.

Does anyone know where I can talk to professional help for free?

I don't need to destroy myself any longer.

If any of my friends are reading this, act as though you didn't ok?